Bait And Switch, Wizard Of Oz Style (Sarah Palin Puppet Theory)
by Steve (Politics)


Pay no attention to the man with the giant tumor on his face! Instead, here's a rockin', innocuous looking  M.I.L.F. we're sure you'll love. Provided you don't get to know her or her policies. Just listen to what we tell you to hear, and all will be well. Because we want you to focus on the fact that Gov. Sarah Palin has a vagina.

Not that she's only been in office for 20 months.

Forget that a poorly trained chimp could've rid Alaska of corruption, that Sarah Palin who is a Buchanan Republican who wants to teach your kids Creationism as fact, who said she is "as anti-abortion as one can be", who doesn't know what the job of the Vice President entails, or who's foreign policy experience consists of living near Russia. Ignore all of that, kids, here's some candy.

In what should be regarded as one of the cheapest, most blatant publicity stunts in American politics, if not history, a woman was trotted out in front of a whopping crowd of 7,500 people on Friday morning to be introduced to the country as John McCain's running mate. Let's forget the banshee-like voice, or the Tina Fey appearance, and go over a couple of things really quickly. Prior to Friday, Sarah Palin had met her running mate once. I'll say that again. Once. The person who could end up running the country if, Jeebus Forbid, something happened to a man who's had cancer four times, shuffles loose the mortal coil in office and technically isn't even old enough get the job. If that sentence was too long, Sarah Palin is 44. You have to be 45 by law to be President. Which would make Nancy Pelosi President. Which is almost as scary.

The basis of McCain's argument against Barack Obama has been his lack of experience. That he doesn't have the street cred in the world at large. He goaded Obama into a tour of the Middle East and Europe, then criticized him for being well received. I have more time on foreign soil than Sarah Palin. Hell, my two year old has probably logged more hours on domestic flights than she has. She was tapped for this job for the sole reason that McCain needs disaffected Hillary voters. And he thinks that just because she's a woman, they'll hop on board (or is it broad?). She has gone on record as being staunchly against a woman's right to choose, something that Hil-Dog's troops are fundamentally opposed to, and has no problem aligning herself with a running mate that voted against equal pay for equal work. She flogged her son's military service as soon as she took the stage-something even Gran'pa Munster won't do (or Biden, for that matter). She has no problem with assault rifles on the streets, something she probably doesn't have to worry about in Alaska, a state that has never seen gang violence or school shootings.

Over the next 66 days, we'll hear how Sarah Palin cleaned up her state by kicking out corrupt officials. For the record, Anchorage looked like the original Mayor Daly's Chicago, and had for nearly 30 years. When Chicago got fed up, they straighted out their city (to a degree) too. This is a blatant act of pandering by a political party with no where else to turn. It's smoke and mirrors at it's finest...and it's politics as usual to a shameful degree. She's good for some time-tested sound bites that appeal to the Republican base, and will come off sounding like a reformer. But Sarah Palin is against the kind of progress that a forward thinking, technological, 21st Century America needs. She would rather educate us with 2.000 year old stories, keep our women barefoot and pregnant, and our money in the pocket of Big Oil. Sarah Palin is a ploy by her party to do what they do best - change the subject because they fall flat on the issues. Please, don't buy into this shit. We are, I hope, better than this. Prove me right, y'all.

- Steve -


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